Wednesday, February 29, 2012

I'm Back!

My mini laptop took a 1.5 foot dive off my husband's lap about a week and a half ago, hit the carpet, and broke it's inner monitor. I'm not sure if that's like one's inner child, but I do know if the inner monitor is busted, you can't see squat on the outside either. I was not mad, but wasn't happy about the situation either. These things happen though so you just move on and figure out how to fix things. So I did. Figure out how to fix the thing. With some help from our IT man, Stephen, I ordered a replacement screen, waited a week, and then begged Stephen for help installing the new screen. He was quite gracious and installed it today! Yaaaay, hooray!

In the week and a half that I went mini-less, I also took the pledge and decided to forego Facebook until Easter. I've discovered something over the past week. I go crazy when I try not to do things. I compulsively do laundry and clean weird things. I order more yarn for more crocheting and knitting projects. I get cranky with co-workers. I get cranky with Alan and Buddy and...myself. I am quite surprised to learn that apparently I'm not a very disciplined person in some ways. I'm  flittery! Who knew? Oh wait. I knew that before, hence the name of my blog, FlitterDee. Well, anyway, I'm happy to say I'm back. Back with my mini, back on Facebook, back to my version of normal.

I've been trying to write some of Mother's story so I can share that here. Mother isn't pleased with my work, however, so I'm having to rewrite. How do I know she's not pleased you ask? Well...let's just say she's woken me up three mornings in a row at an ungodly hour and let me know. Kids, if you think when your parents are gone that will end the instructions and nagging, I have bad news. They still do it! They get in your head and heart while you're young and they are there to stay! It's not all bad though. Honestly, when my mother makes her appearances in my dreams and psyche, it makes me ache with missing her all over again. Or laugh. Mother always had that affect on me. No one could make me laugh harder than Mother. There will be a rewrite of Mother's story forthcoming. As soon as she tells me what it is.

Mother, April 1984

Saturday, February 18, 2012

Saturday Morning

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases.
His mercies never come to an end.
They are new every morning!
Great is thy faithfulness!
The Lord is my portion says my soul,
Therefore I will hope in Him.

(Song from Lamentations 3:22-24)

What beautiful words of encouragement and hope! We sang this song in the youth group and I always loved it. Now, at age 50, after having lived longer with God always by my side, I love it even more. Sometimes it just comes to my mind and soul. It always comes when I need it most, which is always! J

Today we are having carpet installed. I am both excited and overwhelmed by all the prep work I need to do before the installers arrive. I better get busy!  I will write a family history story later.


In Jesus, dewl



Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Sunshine Cake or The Day I Fell in Love With Alan Lane

April 19, 1995. It was a really rough day for the entire United States, especially Oklahoma City. That was the day that the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building was destroyed by a terrorist bomb attack. Instantly everyone had their television or radio on. The internet was in early days so we couldn't go there for news and information like today. I always take things that happen deep within my body, heart, and soul. April 19th was black for me. I could feel the children's terror and the deep grief that struck everyone. I was working at a child abuse clinic (the C.A.R.E. Center of TTUHSC) and my project for the day was cleaning and organizing the small library we had there. It was already a rough day because a library at a child abuse clinic is full of material on, well, child abuse. Then the news of the bombing came through and we all felt sick to our stomachs, sick at heart. I had a television on to watch the news while I sorted through books and slides. Early in the afternoon the news on the bombing was interrupted by a tornado warning for Lubbock County and the City of Lubbock. The bad weather and tails of tornados were heading straight for the area where my two sons were enrolled in elementary school, Lou Stubbs. They wanted parents to come pick their children up if possible or they would be held at the school. To say I was freaking out is putting it mildly. I was completely distraught. We only lived about a block from the school and Alan was at our home. I tried to call Alan, but all lines were busy. Then the Texas Tech emergency alarms went off, the electricity went out, and everyone in Thompson Hall was gathered in the basement. I was really freaking out by that time!

After a while, the alarm was cleared, the electricity was turned back on and I found out the boys were safe at home. Alan was coming to pick me up from work. I was completely wiped out in every way possible. Alan was very kind and reassuring on the way home. We had been good friends for a very long time and I was half way in love with him already. He didn't know that, but it was true. As we pulled up in front of my home, Alan said he had a surprise for me. Inside he proudly displayed a lemon/yellow cake. That cake was literally a ray of sunshine for me in an otherwise horrible day. I called it a sunshine cake and...I fell the rest of the way in love with Alan. The fact that he knew I was so distraught and he wanted to cheer me up and lighten my load sank in like sunshine to my soul and that was that. I was totally, completely in love with Alan Lane. He had no idea of course. Men are quite dense about such things most of the time and I tried not to give myself away. Only later did I tell him the significance of that simple sunshine cake.

Alan and I have gone through many tough times together. Our marriage at many times almost didn't survive. We each went through the pain of watching our parents get horribly sick and pass away, but we did it together. Throughout all of our difficult times and our good times, one thing I could always count on was Alan recognizing when I needed encouragement and love. Sometimes he met those needs through simple long talks and cuddling. Sometimes he took me on road trips to ease my pain. Often times he surprises me with simple gifts or cards or times by myself to just be. Alan and I really love each other. Our relationship and marriage has grit and love. You need both to have a good, lasting marriage.

Today for Valentine's Day he bought me flowers, gave me a card, took me out to eat lunch and when we came home....he had made another sunshine cake. I was touched to tears because sunshine cakes have come to be the symbol of his love for me and my love for him. I'm not a diamond and caviar type of gal. Just give me the love of my husband and a sunshine cake and it's a perfect Valentine's Day for me.

Monday, February 13, 2012

Fascinating Update on Joel & Safronia Wood

My best friend Becky found all kinds of information for me via the cemeteries the Woods and Spences are buried at in Dallas County. I am SO excited! Anyway, this is a link that gives dates and info on Joel and Safronia Wood. I thought I would share. :-)

http://www.findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=gr&GRid=11158435

Silver Air--a poem

Silver Air

When the moonlight's on the water
at the park across the street,
My soul slips out to wander
and hopes my God to meet.

My heart beats fast with wonder
and my breath stops as it starts,
I wonder if I'll ever live
to understand our hearts.

The breeze blows softly on my cheeks
as ducks quack quietly in my ears,
I slowly walk in silver air
and pray to God, "please remove my fears."

The air is sweet with springtime scents
replacing all the old,
I smell green and pink and blue and yellow;
and feel the colors in my soul.

God made all this beauty,
so easily, so right.
He gives me all the peace my soul can hold
in the silver air tonight.

And so my fears are taken and
I know inside my heart--
that God has heard my prayer
and answered,
in the silver air tonight.

dewl  4/13/99

Sunday, February 12, 2012

A Great Romance--L.D. and Inez Wood

Since Valentine's Day is just around the corner, today I will tell the story of the romance that started the family of L.D. and Inez Wood. I would say this could be called a great romance since they were married for sixty six and a half years.

It all started when L.D. and Harrel Wood moved from Carlisle to Woodrow, Texas or from northwest Lubbock County to southern Lubbock County. Due to family circumstances beyond their control (another story to be told later), their farm in Carlisle had been sold and L.D. became an independent sharecropper at the age of 17 in 1931. (For those of you who may not know, a sharecropper is a farmer who rents a farm and pays the rent on the farm by giving a certain percentage of their crop to the landlord.) L.D. began sharecropping in the Woodrow area and continued to farm this way for more than 30 years. He never owned a farm of his own, but always rented. When L.D. and Harrel moved to the Woodrow area, they rented a farm about a mile south of the Gill farm. Mamie Gill decided it would be neighborly for her two eldest daughters, Mary and Inez, to take some cookies over to the Woods and welcome them to the community. Mary was 17 and Inez was 15. Inez had just broken off her engagement to a young man because he was caught in the cotton patch with another girl. He and the girl were not picking cotton so Inez broke up with him in a quick fiery manner, as only she could!

Mary and Inez dressed up in their Sunday best and walked over to the Wood farm carrying their cookies and their welcome. Mother (Inez) told the story as follows for the rest of her life. "Mary and I walked up to the house and Dee (L.D.) and Harrel were on the porch. Dee was playing a jews harp and acting the fool and Harrel was standing in the doorway. Dee didn't see us until we stepped up on the porch. He stopped playing and I could tell he was embarrassed because he turned deep red. Mary and I introduced ourselves and handed Harrel the cookies. Dee was the most handsome man I'd ever met! He had dark hair and the bluest eyes that just twinkled all over at me. I got really shy and couldn't say anything! Mary had to do all the talking, which was quite unusual. I was usually the talker and Mary was the quiet one. Dee wasn't really my type. I usually preferred blonde haired, dark eyed men, but that day I changed my type! He didn't really say much either that day. He just looked at me while Harrel and Mary talked. We didn't stay long and all the way home I talked about Dee. Mary finally got tired of me going on and on and said, "Inez,you think all boys are handsome! Just hush! I'm tired of listening to you!" I hushed, but knew I was already half in love with L.D. Wood.

Inez Gill, Age 15


The next time I saw Dee was at a basketball game. I was on the Woodrow girl's team, although I really wasn't a very good player. I was too short and was always getting caught traveling. I was playing one night and looked up in the stands and there was Dee watching me. When I saw him, he grinned and winked at me. I was completely flustered then and played even worse, thinking he was watching me. When the game was over, I went over and talked to him. I was so self-conscious. I was all hot and sweaty, still dressed in my tacky basketball outfit while he was all dolled up in a suit. Dee always dressed nice out in public. He always wore a suit and tie, wearing a hat. He never had a hair out of place. After that we started seeing each other at dances and would always talk and dance together. Dee was a good dancer. There wasn't a lot to do in the country so people would have parties and dances at their houses on Saturday nights for young people. There would be drinking too. Dee drank some, but never too much. I didn't drink much, if any, because Mother always said ladies shouldn't drink alcohol. Women act stupid when they drink, especially if they get drunk. A drunk woman just embarrasses herself, whether she realizes it or not. Anyway, me and my best friend,Berniece Merrill, always went to the dances together. Berniece would always drink a lot and I would get so disgusted with her, especially when she got sick and threw up all over the place. Berniece liked Dee too, but he was never interested in her like that.

When I really knew I was in love with Dee was when we were picking cotton together one day. We had a contest to see who could pick more cotton down a row the fastest and I beat him! We then kept picking cotton and talking. It got dark and it was cold. Everyone else quit for the day, but we stayed out in that field for hours talking. I told him I was nearly 17, but really I had just turned 16. He was 19 and I didn't want him to think I was too young.

Inez is in the hat about mid picture, L.D. behind her to the right.


We started going steady after that. He would come over every Saturday night and we'd go to dances or sometimes a movie in town. Sometimes we stayed home and played games wtih my family. When Dee asked me to marry him, I was so excited! Back then everyone went to Clovis (N.M.) to get married because there was no waiting period and no blood tests. It was a hundred miles away, but in a good car you could make it in a day. When we went to get married, Harrel and Pauline (Harrel's wife) went with us to stand up with us. I had a pretty new red suit and Dee was dressed up in a new suit. A Baptist preacher married us and that was that! I was thrilled! I married the handsomest, smartest, best man in the country and was so in love."

 
      Marriage Certificate                     The Newlyweds, June 1934


Daddy and Mother were married on June 6, 1934. They lived together for sixty six and a half years and only slept apart if one of them was in the hospital or very ill. They married in the middle of the Great Depression and in the midst of the Dust Bowl. Added to those rough circumstances, they lost their first baby in their first year of marriage. The loss of that first baby haunted them the rest of their lives. Then in 1937 came the arrival of Betty Jean, followed by John D. in 1940, Joe Leslie in 1943, Judy Anne in 1947 and, lastly, Doris Elaine (me) in 1961. Their marriage was not without its tempetuous times. Mother was spirited, jealous, and high tempered. Daddy was quiet with a longer temper that revealed itself in days long pouts of silence. Yet, their marriage worked, survived and grew stronger through the years.

When Mother became ill, starting in 1986, Daddy surprised me by not only taking over the primary housekeeping and cooking, but excelling at it. He even learned how to can and freeze the produce from their backyard garden. As Mother weakened and declined, Daddy revealed how very much he loved her by caring for her persistently and well. He never let up or quit, even as he grew exhausted and frustrated. Truth be told, he seemed to resent any help offered and only accepted help when it was absolutely necessary.

After Mother passed away in 2001, I was blessed with the opportunity to spend more time with Daddy and develop a deeper relationship with him. We had long talks when I would ask him for his side of the stories that Mother had told me all my life. One day we were talking about Mother and I asked him to tell me his version of their romance. He seemed startled by the question as though he had never really considered it before. His version wasn't so detailed, but was equally interesting. His story went like this. "The first time I saw Inez, I knew she was trouble. She was young, beautiful and vivacious. Everything about her seemed to sparkle with life. I honestly tried not to pay too much attention to her, but she just kept turning up! When I first started really courting her, she told me she was nearly 17, but I knew she was barely 16. That was my own little secret. She thought she had me fooled and did throughout her life, but I always knew what was really going on. Heh, heh. (He grinned wryly at this with his eyes twinkling with delight.) When I first met Inez and took her places, she was a little backwards and didn't know what to do out in public. She was quite shy for years, especially about eating out. I got to where I didn't take her out to eat on dates because she wouldn't eat anyway. Charley (Mother's dad) rarely took Mamie or the kids to town as they were growing up so I guess it wasn't too surprising she didn't know how to act there. At country parties and dances she was fine. Going to town, though, was hard on her. We dated quite a while and I decided we better get married." I asked him why he thought that. Was he was madly in love with her? "Oh, I just decided it was time. I didn't think we were a very good match, honestly, because we were so different. She was kind of flighty and high tempered. I was in love with her though and didn't want any of the other guys to take her away from me. She was quite popular, you know. Sure enough, I was right about us being so different. She drove me crazy all my life. I never knew what she was going to do next. She spent money like water and was always thinking she was sick and had to go to the doctor. I can't tell you how much money I spent on doctors over the years. Besides that, everytime she had to go to the doctor, I had to leave the crops for a day, which put me behind. Then she really did get sick, didn't she? Poor thing. She had a really rough go of it at the end and I feel bad about it. Who knows? Maybe she really was sick all those years. It sure was aggravating sometimes. I just never felt like I could get ahead until these last ten years."

At this point in the conversation, I was feeling rather discouraged. Mother and Daddy had some marital difficulties when I was a little girl. He quit calling her "Lady" during that time. Lady had always been Daddy's pet name for Mother. When he quit calling her Lady, she thought he didn't love her any more and it really hurt her. They came out of the difficulties, but he never called her Lady again. As Daddy and I were having our conversation about Mother, I was wondering if Mother had been right about him not loving her, but I was sure he did so I had to ask him, "If Mother drove you so crazy, why did you stay in the marriage?" Honestly, I was afraid of the answer he would give me. "Well, she was always a lot of fun, you know! Life was never boring with Inez! and...I loved her. Just because someone drives you crazy sometimes doesn't mean you quit loving them." The perfect answer and true of both of them I think. They loved each other all the way to the end, despite their ups and downs. I think Mother would have realized how much Daddy always loved her if she had heard him at the end of his life when he had Alzheimer's. Oftentimes he would mistake me for Mother. Each time this occurred, he would be worried and concerned that she was safe and had what she needed. He would say, "I love you and will be home as soon as I can Lady. I miss you."  I know they were both happy when he finally made it home to her. Their love really was true and eternal.








Thursday, February 9, 2012

Family History: Joel and Saffronia Wood

Granddad's father (my great granddad) was named Joel Wood and his was an interesting life. I don't have any specific dates for him so far as birth, death or marriages, but I do have his story. According to Dad, Joel was a wealthy farmer in Tennessee before the Civil War. I always pictured a plantation, but I have a vivid imagination so it might have simply been a large farm. Joel was married and had twelve children in Tennessee. When the Civil War began, he and his sons who were of age joined the Confederate Army and went to battle. Some time during or immediately following the war, Joel's first wife died. (Name of first wife is unknown, unfortunately.)

Like many other southeners, after the war was over and during the reconstruction period, Joel decided to move west and start over. He left his farm to his children in Tennessee and moved to north Texas. (I have no information on Joel's first family. Dad was always frustrated at not knowing more about them and fascinated by the fact that there was an entire other part of the family elsewhere.) During or immediately after Joel moved to Texas, he met the woman destined to be his second wife. Her name was Saffronia, she was full blood Cherokee and was said to be quite beautiful. She was much younger than Joel, who was probably at least in his 40's when he moved to Texas. Joel bought and established a farm in the Rowlett-Sachse-Wylie area northeast of Dallas. During his second life, he again had a large family. Dad always said the second family had ten children, but I've only been able to find the names and stories of about six children. These are: Maggie, Josie, Joe, George (granddad), Sam and John. Granddad Wood was born on February 22, 1879 and I always understood him to be the youngest child. My sister Judy believes he was about the 3 from the last child born to Joel and Saffronia. Apparently Joel and Saffronia were happy on their farm with their large family and Joel never moved again. From Saffronia came the darker skin that some of the family still have. Combined with the deep blue eyes and black hair of the Woods, it was a handsome outcome.

Saffronia died before Dad ever had a chance to meet her, but he did meet and know his Granddad Joel. Daddy said he was a feisty, quiet old man with a twinkle in his eye. (Imagine that, a Wood man with a mischieveous twinkle in his eye!) Joel was always glad to see his family from west Texas whenever they came to visit. Dad's family went often to visit the family because not only the Woods lived there, but the Spences (Grandmother Wood's family)  lived there too. (Dad, in his teens, even walked to Dallas several times to visit his family. That's another story though and will be told later.) As Dad was growing up, visiting his family in north Texas was very important to him. He loved his family, especially his uncles, and I think his connection with them helped him to develop a very strong identity as a "Wood."

I admit I've always been intrigued by Joel's story. Being born in the 1830's in the south, having a big family and farm there, and surviving the Civil War would be a fascinating story all by itself. The fact that after the war he moved to Texas, married a Cherokee woman, and built another completely new life is inspiring to me. He didn't slow down and get old idly. He lived a very full life all the way to the end of his years in his 90's. He had the grit, determination and intelligence that characterized the pioneer spirit in the United States. I saw that same spirit in Dad and his kids. I know it lives on in the current generation and I hope it continues to exist in future generations. As Mother used to say, "We come from strong, good stock. We're the type of family who can make it through anything and live to tell the tale!"

Saturday, February 4, 2012

Bigamy and the Flim Flam Man

In 1920, women didn't enjoy the freedoms that we do now. They had some legal freedoms, but not true freedom. Society and cultural expectations kept women pretty much tied down in many ways. When Granddad Wood died, his property all passed to Grandmother. There was no legal question of that at all. However, at that time, when a woman's husband died, it was expected that she would marry again. That way, she would have someone to manage her affairs and provide safety and security for herself and her children. Grandmother was smart and hardworking, but she had four children and a farm to run by herself. Her children ranged in age from 12 to 3 and the oldest, Jewel, was a girl.

Ray, L.D., Harrel & Jewel Wood


Grandmother no doubt felt overwhelmed by grief at losing her husband and worry about caring for and raising her children alone. One day a handsome man came to the Carlisle area. He was a traveling salesman, but decided he liked the area and might stay a while. Mostly, I think, he knew about or met Grandmother in her newly widowed state and saw an opportunity. After all, she did own a substantial amount of land and have money. (The Wood farm was the entire section between what is now 19th and 34th streets, Iola and Milwaukee Avenues.) I can't recall the man's full name or even if it was ever told to me. It seems like his last name was Todd, so we'll go with that for now (Ok, I spoke with my sister Judy and she remembers his last name was Ternell. She never heard a first name either.) Mr. Ternell began courting Grandmother in earnest. About six weeks after Granddad Wood died, Grandmother married Mr. Ternell. Grandmother thought she had solved her problems, had help, and fancied herself in love with Mr. Ternell and that he was in love with her. Daddy said it was obvious, even to himself at six years old, that Ternell was a flim-flam man. Blonde, blue eyed, and dressing like a dandy, he was quite a charmer, but Daddy didn't trust him and told Grandmother so. Grandmother didn't listen to her six year old son. She thought Daddy was simply upset about her remarrying and replacing his much loved father. She should have listened to her six year old!

Soon after the marriage, Mr. Ternell began spending Grandmother's money and even wanted to sell some of her land. He reasoned that he wasn't a farmer, so it would be better to sell the land and move into town. I think Grandmother must have had some doubts about her new husband after this, but did nothing. She didn't sell any of her land either, though. Mr. Ternell was often gone for periods of time on sales trips so life returned to a fairly normal way for Grandmother and her kids.

One afternoon someone knocked on the door and when Grandmother answered, there was a woman and children on the porch. "I'm looking for my husband! I know he's here!"  Mr. Ternell was married and had three children! The other family lived in East Texas. His real wife decided something odd was going on and came to find him. Apparently this was not the first time Mr. Ternell had played with bigamy. It was, however, the last time he did. Grandmother had him arrested and annuled the marriage. Needless to say, this embarrassing story was kept pretty quiet within the family. Daddy always seemed to enjoy telling it. Perhaps because his six year old self saw right through the flim-flam man?

Ray & L.D. Wood playing in their dress clothes.
Daddy is on the right.

Friday, February 3, 2012

Memory Boxes

Because it is cold and snowy outside, we're staying inside. At least I'm staying inside. I was looking for a little notebook where I took notes from Daddy on family history and geneology. It's a little black notebook and I've yet to find it, but in the course of going through the memory box, which holds my journals, pictures, cards, the boys' school work and pictures, and stuff, I've become lost within my memories. Most of the memories are good. Some are difficult to look at so I've skimmed over those for now. In the midst of my trip down memory lane, I found this poem that I wrote in 2003. I thought I would share it.

Sometimes life is difficult,
And we ask the question, why?
Why can't life be simply beautiful,
As a turquoise-tinted sky?

Sometimes the pain and beauty,
Become quite intertwined,
As the blessings and the curses
Through our lives do wind.

Especially as a mother,
I often ask, "Why this?"
And You softly give Your answers
In the sweetness of a kiss.

Life in all its gore,
Life in all its joy,
Can become a bit unnerving,
Is that Your special ploy?

To give us glimpse of heaven
And a little peek at hell,
To give us a reminder,
You alone can make all well?

I wish I knew the answers,
I wish I passed the test,
But tonight all I can do is weep,
and let You do the rest.
D.Elaine Wood-Lane, June 25, 2003

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Beautiful Thursday Morning

Just because it’s Thursday and because this is a beautiful, peaceful picture, I’m sharing it with all of you.  A West Texas sunrise complete with windmill.  This photo was taken by Wyman Meinzer, professional photographer this morning, I believe.