Happy Birthday Nat!

28 years ago today my son Nat was born. It was a rough day for both of us, but he finally arrived at 2:32 p.m. via emergency C-section.

Nat shortly after birth

For the first couple of hours (days), every time I held him or nursed him, we would both fall asleep after about 3 minutes. (General anesthesia after 24+ hours of laboring for mother and baby will do that to you.) When we were both awake, we would just stare at each other. I was studying every little bit of him and storing those miracles and memories in my heart. Nat, on the other hand, was staring at me skeptically as if to say, "Who the heck are you?!"

Our first week together was a blur, but I took pictures of the moments with my heart's eyes and tucked them away to remember forever. It was the 1980's in the pre-digital photo era. Rolls of film came with 12, 24, or 36 exposures. We have pictures, obviously, but not as many. The best pictures are in our memories anyway, don't you think?

My memory pictures include Craig holding Nat with pride, love, and sheer terror; Nat sleeping in his bassinet in the living room while family and friends gathered to meet him; and Grandmas Wood and Cooley taking turns holding the new grandson. Oh, and then there's the one of Craig and Esmerelda, our cat, fighting all over the apartment after Esmerelda hissed and scratched at newborn Nat. I guess Esme wasn't happy with the new creature in the house who was stealing all our attention. (After the fight, Esmerelda became Nat's own personal guard cat. She was very protective of him and would hiss if someone not on her approved list got too close to him or presumed to pick him up without permission.) There are also pictures of Nat sleeping, Nat nursing, and Nat screaming because he wanted his food NOW, thank you very much.  Nat liked to eat a lot back then, every 3 hours or else!

Nat--1 month old

My favorite memory picture of all came a couple of days after we came home from the hospital. It was morning and was the first time I was completely alone with my new son. I was sitting on the green plaid couch in the living room with Nat laying on my lap, wide awake for the first time. I sat there and marveled at every precious inch of my firstborn: the red "stork bite" birthmark on the nape of his neck, his head of light hair, deep blue eyes, and perfectly formed fingers, toes, ears, and nose. He was adorable and I couldn't quit looking at him, soaking him in and talking to him. I was filled with that awe that new mothers and dads feel when first having a child. This baby in my lap was a true miracle just by his existence and second by his surviving such a traumatic labor and delivery. I was completely filled by a deep, aching maternal love for him that still exists today. When I had his brother, Josh, it happened all over again.

Baby boy Nat grew up into a gentle giant who at 6'3" towers over his 5'3" tall mother. In my heart, though, part of him will always be my baby.

Craig, Elaine & Nat Cooley
June, 1984